Things I Would Go Back And Tell Myself As A New Parent
For those of us that have “been there, done that,” we know there are many things (more than we’d like to admit) that we would like to do over. My sister has a shirt that says, “Motherhood is a Walk in the Park – Jurassic Park!” Totally Relatable, right?
We can likely all agree with the age-old saying, “The days are long, but the years are short” - but that doesn’t really help us in navigating the day-to-day or the many stages of raising children.
While experience is often the best teacher, we have polled some of our very own Rhea Lana’s Moms to ask them…. If you could go back in time to speak to your younger, first-time-mom self, what advice would you give her?
For any new, expecting or early-in-the-trenches moms reading this – we hope you will glean wisdom and insight to help you in your own journey through Motherhood.
We'll start with the funny ones first, because if moms need anything - it's a laugh (well, second to sleep and coffee, maybe.)
Autumn - Mom of 8
"Teach them to love Jesus and how to brown ground beef and they’ll be fine. The other stuff will work itself out."
Susan - Mom of 4"Don’t worry so much about potty training! I don’t even remember potty training my triplets and yet here they are potty trained teenagers!"
Katelyn - Mom of 3
"Whatever you say you will never do…you’re definitely gonna do at some point. Give yourself and others a little more grace."
Lynzie - Mom of 6"Motherhood is full of ever-changing seasons. Some seasons feel like you’ll never sleep again. Some seasons feel like you’ll never leave your house again. Some seasons bring more breathing-room and independence. Seasons change and none of it ever stays the same!"
Natalie N. - Mom of 9"Take videos, lots of videos! Tell your husband to take photos and videos with you and your babies, and all of your kids. Don't always be the one behind the camera. Make vacations a priority! You don't always have to spend lots of money, but kids remember the times you got away and made memories!"
Valerie - Mom of 1"Buy all your baby needs at Rhea Lana's! My daughter was 7 when I discovered Rhea Lanas' and I’m still kicking myself that I didn’t know about it sooner for when I needed all my baby gear, toys and clothing. Also, don’t compare yourself to other moms. You do you and your “you” is good enough."
Haylee - Mom of 1
"Don’t sweat the small stuff, let the laundry pile up, just savor every second with that small baby and snuggle them all you can. The time goes too fast."
Lisa - Mom of 1, Grammy of 4
"I would tell her to relax & not to get so stressed over the things that aren’t important! "
Tonia - Mom of 2, Foster Mom to 76 in 10 Years!
"You are enough! Cookies for dinner is OK sometimes and a bath isn't always worth the battle. Hold them tight and love them."
Lauren - Mom of 3
"Enjoy your kids everyday! You will never have this day or this age again. Laugh often and let yourself play with them. It’s so easy to get bogged down by chores and tasks but even 10 minutes out of your day to build a train track or a block tower masterpiece will go such a long way for your kiddo. I have to remind myself to find joy in the ordinary moments!"
Chelsey - Mom of 2
"Being present is more important than anything else!"
Amanda - Mom of 2
"Don’t sweat the small stuff!! Relax and accept the help!"
Christine - Mom of 2
"Try to stop and enjoy it because time flies by way too fast!"
Brynna - Mom of 6
"Relationship over rules. Rules don't stick without a relationship."
Jodie - Mom of 3
"Take better care of yourself. And ask for help when you need it."
Rhonda - Mom of 2
"Relax. Give the ‘girls’ and yourself a break! It’s completely fine if he has formula too."
Kim - Mom of 2
"Be intentional! Pause your to do list and take the time to play. Go on trips, it's just money and you'll treasure the memories so much more!"
Jennifer - Mom of 2
"Don’t sweat the small stuff. Spend 1-on-1 time with each kid. This is when they will open their hearts to you. These are moments you will cherish forever. Show your kids what it means to work hard but also enjoy life"
Samantha - Mom of 2
"You are enough and built for hard things. Storms come and go, but the sun does come out."
Katie - Mom of 2
"It’s ok to not be ok; there is no shame in it. Don’t be afraid to ask for help."
Tina - Mom of 6
"Take that leap of faith and stay home to raise your babies!"
Amber B - Mom of 2
"Trust your gut, always."
Julie - Mom of 3, Gigi of 2
"Don’t rush away the years. Relax and enjoy even the stressful days."
Nicole - Mom of 3
"Breathe! It’s all not that big of deal. Don’t go by the books, worry about routines, worry about the tantrums, etc. It all is easier if don’t worry about doing it right so much, you’ll enjoy it more and not be as stressed!"
Jessie - Mom of 2
"It’s ok to be behind on chores. Take the time to be intentional with your kids. They grow so quick. Chores will still be there tomorrow."
Natalie - Mom of 2
"Spend your time WITH the kids take them fun places and do fun activities even if they don’t remember it it’s what builds character and imagination."
Haley - Mom of 4
"Motherhood is a gift and pure joy but also the hardest thing you will ever do. Give yourself lots of grace and know that YOU are the perfect mom for your babies."
Brittany - Mom of 3
"Be more patient and enjoy all the little moments. I just potty trained my 3rd and I noticed a huge difference this time in just taking my time and being super patient."
Taylor - Mom of 1
"It’s ok to not want people over and set boundaries. Do what is best for you and baby in those first few days/weeks/months. Don’t worry about every little thing because it’s all going to be okay!"
Valerie - Mom of 2
"Don’t stress over the small things, remember to get in the pictures sometimes, and enjoy every second because time is a thief!"
Kaitlin - Mom of 2
Trust yourself, you do know what you are doing. When you doubt, don't be afraid to reach out and call on others for help. Asking for help is a strength not a weakness.
Hannah- Mom of 2"Enjoy ALL the moments! At times it feels like this stage will never end but it will and one day you will look back and miss those moments. Time goes too fast... BREATHE!!"
Amber G - Mom of 4
"Remember the lasts! Last time your son holds your hand, the last time your girl falls asleep in your lap, the last time your hug can fix everything. It's easy to remember the firsts because you know they are coming but it takes effort to remember the lasts."
Josie - Mom of 2
"Trust your instincts & give yourself grace."
Teresa - Mom of 3, Grammy of 3
"You are doing a great job!"
Amy B - Mom of Twins
"You can never take too many short videos! Take the everyday stuff. Eating, playing on the activity mat, playing with favorite toy, giggling, reading together, playing in the grass, playing in the leaves, in the snow, dressed up in costumes, etc. Don't worry about the background of what your house looks like. Capture the special milestone moments with family and friends but don't forget the little every day moments. Those short videos of everyday life from when they were babies are the ones my eight year old twins ask to watch over and over again. I wish I had taken more!"
Amy D - Mom of 4, Mamere of 4
"You can’t spoil them. You are teaching security."
Jessica - Mom of 4
"You’re not going to get it right every time. Take the time and effort to apologize to your children when you mess it up or lose your cool. Ask for help when you need it."
Jillian - Mom of 1
"Your daughter is going to be fine, and so are you!"
Monika - Mom of 2
"Let them play with mud, explore the world, they will remember you playing with them not the toy they like for a month and no longer like!"
Sherrie - Mom of 2
"JUST RELAX! I was so uptight and obsessive about doing everything perfectly that my anxiety set the tone for the baby, so he was really fussy and unsettled. Once I figured out that it was going to be difficult to mess him up I relaxed, and his demeanor completely changed."
Edwina - Mom of 3
"Hold the baby and relax. Feed on demand and everyone will be so much happier. Also remember mom knows best."
Ashley - Mom of 4
"Let go of your idea of what motherhood would or should be like and live in the moment. It’s not going to be perfect. Don’t waste precious time trying to be."
Jennifer - Mom of 4
"Trust your gut. Give yourself grace to learn. It's ok to ask for help. Take care of yourself. Be ok with pivoting & things not being perfect, and don’t compare yourself to other moms. You do you!"
Megan - Mom of 3
"Don’t judge your parenting against others, especially what is put out there on social media!"
Karen - Mom of 1
"You will have good days and not so good days, good seasons and not so good seasons but just do the best you can (nobody’s perfect), reach out to other mamas (they are so resourceful and have walked in your shoes), enjoy the moments and take lots of pics and videos. You will be glad you did bc they really do grow up so fast!"
Stephanie - Mom of 2
"Get a birth photographer. Be kind to yourself, give yourself grace, and don't be afraid to ask for help. If you don't enjoy breastfeeding, don't keep doing it because others want you to. Not breastfeeding does not make you a failure. It's ok if you don't have "love at first sight" with your baby, it's strange and surreal, and love grows."
Angeline - Mom of 4
"The best gift you can give your kids is your time and attention. Don't get caught up with material things."
Natasha - Mom of 1
"Time flies by so quickly, treasure each and every moment with your child(ren). Listen and trust your instinct, you are the Mom and you know best. Read to your child(ren) every day. You are amazing and are doing a great job!"
Liz - Mom of 2
"You will hear and read all sorts of wanted (and unwanted) advice. At the end of the day, you are the mama and know what is best. Trust your instincts."
Sayre - Mom of 1
"Don't compare your hard days to someone else's depicted best days as seen on social media. Comparison is the thief of joy and nothing can make you feel like a failure or bad mom quite like another mom's winning-at-life highlight reel."
Stephanie E. - Mom of 2, Foster Mom to 11 over the years
"Find your people. The one or two friends you can vent to daily without judgement. It’ll be your saving grace. Prioritize making core memories; travel with your kids, even when you know it’ll be hard! Take ALL the pictures and videos. You’ll be so thankful you did!
Sierra - Mom of 2, Foster Mom to 3
"Motherhood is nothing like you can ever imagine. Take it one day at a time. Take in the highs and the lows because one day you will miss even the hard time."
Heather - Mom of 2
"Pray for your children and with them! Read to them.. Make it an adventure... something you look forward to and not a chore. If you have a tough day remember, “Tomorrow is a new day with no mistakes in it... yet.” - L.M. Montgomery, Anne of Green Gables
Jo Anna - Mom of 2
"Take the picture and then put your phone down and enjoy them without distractions!"
Jennifer R - Mom of 5, Grandma of 1
"Enjoy all the stages!"
Whatever stage of Motherhood you're in, we hope you feel honored and celebrated this weekend ~ and take time to truly enjoy it!